Make_____

MONTH 1:
You can do no wrong and you are a miracle in my life
before you it was drinking from 5 pm until I couldn’t stand up
every night
before you I knew only rejection and hurt and nothing like this
has been in my life before, nothing
What do you need? I’ll give it to you
let me rub you all night, even while you’re asleep, let me
hold you, run my fingers over your skin
Do you need some water?  Are you hungry?
let me make you come, come with me
What do you need?  I want you to have it
I made a heart on the beach out of hand picked shells,
it took me an hour and
I wrote your name in it

MONTH 2:
You can do no wrong and you are a miracle in my life
what we have is rare
I would like you to meet my family, my friends,
no pressure
Too soon?  I understand.
let’s go to see my friends in a city a few hours from here,
it’s on me
Do you need gas?  Are you hungry?  Come with me,
let’s eat
Have you seen this film?  Let’s read together by the water,
in the sun,
our place
we have a place now, you and I
I’ve told your friends, and now I’m telling you,
I can say it cause it won’t stay in any longer I’m telling you I love you
I love you
move with me, move with me where we can be happier than this,
I’ve got a spreadsheet, all detailed, the financial holes are filled so nothing
can follow us, nothing,
and I would like to pay off your car, can I do that?
I bought you something today, an ipad, and a case to go with it
I know you’re doubtful-
Get used to this, get used to me,
I’m not going anywhere, not going to leave you, wouldn’t
do that to
you

MONTH 3:
You can do no wrong and you are a miracle in my life
what we have is rare
come to the moutains with me
in the sky, above us, on the desert road
clouds split apart
and we agree it looks like a crab
Yes, I love you, very much
No, I’m not in the mood, that shouldn’t be sad
It’s my Ex, he texts me, wants me back, but I ingore him
I don’t want to be mean
You and I, we both have bad dreams
I am reaffirming you, you are attractive to me
This is how I am, you should know this by now, I’m not
distant
I’m not unattracted to you, we got sex out of the way, it’s not
a big deal now
Ideally, yes, you and I will move together, ideally
I love you so much
back from the trip and six days together and I’m calling you
on the way (somewhere)
to tell you, I love you again
and the next day I only acknowledge you in sporadic
jolts
and you’re asking me if everything’s fine and
I say I want my space, and when you come
back to my house and want to hold me I say if you want to
and we sleep
in the morning you ask again
and I tell you
I say, I love you.  As a person.  I don’t see you in my future.
and you’re crying, so I join you, clinging to your back, my hands
like pincers, but not because I’m sad
but because you’re crying
and I see you out later, at night, the same bar
and you’re still crying, and I say to your friend that
you seem so sad
you ask why? and it’s appropriate.  I expect it.
and I say, I have no reason, and if I knew
I’d tell you, it’s not the end of the world, it’s not the Ex, it’s not, it’s that I felt
pressured and
you’ll get over me eventually, isn’t that how these things work
I’m going swimming with my friends, and we’re going out later,
no talking between us
for at least 2 weeks, and we’ll be great friends, great friends
you’ll see

THE CLOSE:
You were great, you did nothing wrong
you were great, back to being alone
for me, that’s all, that’s all

(the sky over the same road, in the desert, is clear blue.  Nothing marks it.  And it goes forever)